Tipping is ingrained in American service culture. It is almost a reflex to tip after any encounter with a server or employee in virtually every sales interaction.
But there are situations where people are reluctant to tip and do so not because the tip is earned but because they feel pressured into it. This is why one woman is being applauded for listening to her gut and refusing to give in to the pressure to tip.
Tipping and American Culture
Tipping is commonplace among American consumers. Tip jars at the counters of coffee shops are a familiar sight.
In a restaurant, it’s standard practice for a gratuity to be included in the bill. In many cases, servers in these environments work for less than minimum wage, so they depend on gratuities for part of their income.
Going Too Far
Many now feel that tipping culture is going too far, with automatic tips being included in situations that many shoppers feel are inappropriate.
Even if they’re not contending with bizarre scenarios like tips being included at self-service checkouts, many American consumers feel they are increasingly encountering situations where they feel forced to tip when they don’t think one is warranted.
Reluctant Tips Add Up
Tipping may be commonplace, but these reluctant tips add up and take a financial toll on consumers.
A survey of 2000 U.S. adults conducted by Talker Research found that respondents reluctantly tip $37.80 per month due to the pressure of the situation. This adds up to $453.60 a year of reluctant tipping. 26% of participants also said they are always or often pressured to tip more than they wish to.
The Washington State Subway Woman
One woman from Washington State took a stand against out-of-control tipping culture during a trip to Subway.
She recounts the full details of her experience on Reddit under the handle u/CardiologistSilly926. She details her visit to the sandwich chain with her family. On the r/AITAH subreddit she asks, “AITA for having tip removed at Subway?”
A Family Order
The woman’s Subway experience starts normally enough. She visits the Subway with her husband and two nieces.
As detailed in the Reddit thread: “My husband and I each ordered a pretzel and my two nieces each ordered a footlong sub sandwich.” The foundations for her reluctance to tip probably began with her order.
Drinks Service
The woman detailing the experience notes: “I am the only one who got a drink, which they promptly handed me an empty cup and a straw to fill myself.”
As a tip, in principle, is supposed to be in recognition of the service provided, simply giving a customer an empty cup to fill themselves when they order a drink immediately removes an element of this customer service that a person is supposedly tipping for.
Receiving the Bill
After completing the order for her family, including the empty cup she had to fill herself, the woman checked the bill before paying. Something wasn’t adding up, quite literally.
“When we checked out they added an automatic 20 percent tip which equaled $8.51,” she explains.
Feeling Indignant
The woman was less than pleased about the automatic inclusion of a service charge. In her own words: “I was indignant and made them remove the tip.”
She explained to her server: “I do not tip where I have to stand to order my food, get my own drink and clean up after myself.”
Tipping Pressure Is Real
The woman acknowledged that “tipping pressure is real” in Washington, a state where the minimum wage is $16.28 an hour. This is significantly less than the minimum wage for fast-food workers in some states.
But echoing a sentiment seemingly shared by more and more people these days, she felt the enforced 20% charge went too far in this instance.
Tipping Fatigue
Dianne Gottsman, etiquette expert and founder of The Protocol School of Texas, describes this as an example of “tipping fatigue” in a world where “the opportunity to tip is more prevalent and frustrating than ever.”
She agrees that this woman was not “obligated to leave a tip for a routine service.” Reddit users seem to echo this support, with one user saying “tipping is way out of hand nowadays” and another commenting, “The fact that they added the tip on without your permission is out of line and should be illegal.”
To Tip, or Not to Tip
Tipping is not only polite, but it is an integral part of the economic landscape in America. However, a service charge on a restaurant bill and a mandatory tip at a sandwich shop counter are two different things.
Tipping is fundamentally discretionary in all situations, but especially in what would traditionally be a “tip jar” sort of transaction. It’s easy to see why so many Reddit users supported this woman’s decision to refuse to pay the mandatory tip Subway added to her bill.
